Hello everyone! A lot of you asked me questions after my last article, and here I’m going to answer some of them, starting with some life advice.
Q: What is one thing you wish people knew about homelessness? – Elisia
A: One thing that I wish people knew about homelessness is how much it really affects you emotionally. I’ve seen a lot of people treat homeless people with little to no respect simply because of their situation, and sure, you can do what you want; but what people in general really need is love, because that is what lifts them out of the darkness into the light. Being homeless truly is a dark place to be in life, but you can still find light in the darkness even if the darkness seems like it goes on for miles. Luckily, the assistance programs in Pittsburgh are decently easy to access. However, I will say not all of them help in the way that you’d necessarily want them to, and some of them can even have abusive environments and other things; you always want to feel out the situations you’re getting yourself into so you don’t put yourself into a situation you wish you weren’t a part of.
Q: I need advice: how do I stop comparing my life to everyone else’s? – Kiley
A: In my experience, what causes one to compare their situations is a lack of contentment within themselves. You probably already know this to some extent, but it runs deeper than just lacking something. What causes things like this is usually some deeper wound that you haven’t worked through yet, presumably where you were told you weren’t good enough or that you needed to be more like someone else. As humans, we tend to internalize things like this unconsciously, then those things become the backbone of our thinking processes. The best advice that I can give here is: don’t try to stop comparing yourself to others; look within yourself and find the underlying wound that is leading you to not be content with yourself, and then let it hurt, process it, and let go.
Q: What is the biggest challenge you face that the average person walking by would never think of? – LQ Sarson
A: One of the biggest challenges I face is, quite frankly, just living life. I struggle a lot to even do the basic things in life like brushing my teeth and showering, but I find a way to push through regardless. This comes from complex PTSD, which can be debilitating in that it requires a ton of mental energy to do anything, and my memory is terrible. One of my friends once told me, “You never remember anything anyone’s ever said to you ever.” I laughed, because it’s true.
Q: Where/when do you feel the safest? (Safety is of course a massive concern when facing homelessness) — LQ Sarson
A: This is the perfect time to talk about what makes me feel safe; honestly, not much really. I find safety in having control over my life, not allowing people to step over me or do things to me I wouldn’t want done to me. One thing that does make me feel safe is coding and other similar things; it’s something to keep my mind occupied, and is quite frankly one of my favorite things to do. My dream is to eventually be able to code for work full time, rather than only as a hobby that I have passion for.
Q: Favorite quote or motivator that gets you through your hardest days? –Amber
A: One of the things that I always think of when I’m feeling down is what my grandma said to me right before she passed away, and that is: “You have my strength, don’t cry now”. That really hits deep because my grandmother was a very strong woman; she had been through a lot in life, and regardless of any of it, she still chose to be kind and genuine, and I think that is what true strength is: being able to remain true to yourself even in your darkest moments. If you’re ever feeling down, think about all the days you’ve made it through to get to now; you’re so much stronger than you may feel at times, and you can do this.
Life is one of those things that none of us truly understand, but your take on it is what matters. Live how you will, but put love out there, and you will receive it back.